This might sound a little bit like do gooderism, or just some virtue signaling kind of silliness... I assure you it is not.
A part of the mindfulness experience is to realize some important fundamentals about your fellow human being and the way in which we interact.
I consciously go out of my way to have a meaningful interaction, and to also do something a little bit out of the norm for people, even though to me it should be customary.
I will give you an example. I do this all the time and the reaction from people is always the same. They light up like a Christmas tree and they are greatly appreciative, and that return makes me feel really good.
Whenever I go to Costco and grab a cart, I automatically grab the first cart, not for myself but for somebody right behind me, and I make sure I hand it to them.
At the heart of this is acknowledgment... the recognition that another human being is right there with you.
It costs me nothing. Three seconds and a turn of the wrist. But something happens in that little exchange that is far bigger than a shopping cart, and you can watch it land on their face in real time.
More than anything else, human beings just want to be recognized and acknowledged for being there.
Think about how much of the day the average person moves through completely unseen. Scanned, processed, stepped around, talked past. Nobody is cruel to them. Nobody has to be. Indifference does the job just fine, and indifference is the water most people are swimming in from the moment they walk out the door.
So when you break that pattern, even in the smallest way, you are not being nice. You are telling somebody the truth... that they exist, and that you noticed.
It is absolutely amazing how much you can brighten another person's day for free, and without much effort, by simply acknowledging their existence.
You can go further. Buy their coffee. Help somebody with their bags, or with something heavy to load. Or something as simple as opening the door for them and telling them hello, and meaning it.
That last part is the whole thing. Meaning it. A hollow hello is just noise and everybody can hear the difference. Look at the person. Actually see them for one second. That one second is the entire technology.
Not only does this make the day a little bit better for people, it makes the day more enjoyable for you.
And that is not a side effect. That is the mechanism. There is no separation between you and the person in front of you, so what you hand out is what you are standing in. You cannot pour warmth into somebody else's morning and then go have a cold one yourself. As above, so below, in the parking lot at Costco same as anywhere else.
The entire purpose of waking up every single day is to enjoy the ever loving life out of life.
So stop all your bitching and all your hating and all your complaining and blaming and pretending the bad guy is out there.
Go back to the drawing board and realize every single person is fighting the same universal battle within.
The guy who cut you off, the woman who was short with you at the counter, the one who did not say thank you when you held the door. You have no idea what is running in their theater right now. You only ever see the outside of it, and you are judging their outside against your inside, which is a rigged fight every single time.
The least you can do is not add to their suffering... and it is a wise enterprise to do what you can to ease it just a little bit.
Wise, because it comes back. Not in some cosmic ledger somewhere out there, but immediately, in the quality of the day you are actually living in. You are building the world you have to walk around in. Build a better one. Start with the cart.
As above, so below
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